Day Two: Sacrifice at the Starbucks Alter

I actually exceeded my intentional kind deeds today by one. I know I was shocked. Two things in one day…WOW!

DEED ONE

Anyone who knows me knows that it is quite possible I would sell my soul or do just about anything for a Venti, non-fat, no foam latte in the morning. Especially on those mornings when I have to work or be on the road. Today was one of those mornings. I went through the starbucks drive through and instead of getting my usual I gave the person at the counter a fifteen-dollar-gift card and asked her to apply it to all the people that came behind me. There was nobody behind but I left the card and my faith in the window attendant. I wondered how people would react when they pulled up and their bill was paid. Would they be surprised? Would they think of it all day? Would they do something nice for someone else because I had done something nice for them? I will never know. What I do know is that it feels good for me to think about and reflect on those questions. It feels good to wonder how my actions may cause a ripple effect of kindness. Most of all it feels good putting my needs, my beloved Venti Latte, aside for someone else. Guess what I learned….I didn’t die from not having my latte…I will live to see another day. Deprived of caffeine but alive!

DEED TWO

I have a really good friend I have known for over twenty-years. We went to high school together and then on to college and roomed together. We were roommates for a second until we figured out we were going to kill one another…different story..
My friend took a little bit of a different route than I did.. She met and married her husband when she was fairly young, 19 or 20 years old. The day of her wedding, in which I was the maid of honor, I told her it wasn’t too late to change her mind run away with me to Canada. It was New Years Eve and my girlfriends and I were headed to Canada to see mail strippers and drink the night away…what better place to be at 19 years old on New Years Eve?
I believe the statement that I made to her about changing her mind has stuck with her over the last twenty-years. I know this is true because she has brought it up often. She believed I thought she was making a big mistake. In reflecting back, I am sure she was right and I was being judgmental, like a lot of 19-year-olds.
We have kept in contact over the years. She has four wonderful children. She has faced adversity, self sacrifice and stress over the years. Her spirit, soul and support has never been broken. She has stayed focused on being a wonderful, loving woman and mother. I have never told her I believed this of her… never one time in my life that I can remember I said those words to her….long past time. Today I texted her and told her “I have always respected and admired you as a woman and mother and I am blessed to know you. I love you”. I cried when I sent her the text because I felt ashamed I had never said those words to her before. I fear she may have thought I was disapproving of her choices all of these years. I haven’t been. I have just been wrapped up in my own life and never took the time to tell her that it doesn’t matter about approval or disapproval. What matters is that she is a special and wonderful person who I am proud of respect and love.
What I learned today is to forget about my own needs for a second and to people how I feel about them more often.