Day Six: Straight Talk or Silence

Okay I am going to jump off on a bit of a soap box right now. What is wrong with our society? Nobody wants to engage in straight talk or tell others the truth about self-destructive behaviors. So how did I come up with my latest act of kindness? I went running with a friend yesterday and we were talking about a mutual acquaintance. A person in their early 30’s who is attractive, fun, has a great personality, bright and great potential. He is also a raging drunk…an alcoholic, no question. She showed me a recent picture of him and he looked like he was a 50 year old alcoholic…you know the type. Bloated, wrinkled, blood shot..the near death look. It was really sad! We all have our problems I know. I am far from perfect and I have gone to the bottom and been in pain and despair in my life so I want to make it clear this is not me being judgmental. The discussion we had about our mutual acquaintance disturbed me. People have known for many years that this person has a serious problem with alcohol. I have only known him for six months but it became clear immediately. The disturbing thing is that nobody wants to be straight with him. His friends and family continue to drink with him. They talk behind his back one moment about him needing an intervention and the next moment they are meeting him slugging down booze with him. Are you kidding me?
To me this is a prime example of a societal problem. Someone is killing themselves in front of those who “love” him and they are not doing a damn thing about it! Yes I know…people have to change for themselves but when you are so emotionally damaged, in pain and biologically addicted to alcohol it is not easy. So why aren’t people sitting him down and saying to him “I love you and you are sick. We know that you need help and we are going to support and help you. We won’t continue to booze it up with you or give you alcohol”? So from this came my kind act of the day.
I am committed from this day forward to practice straight talk and support. I will be damned if I sit by and let anyone within my eyesight self-destruct without doing something about it. Look I can’t save the world but I can tell someone that I understand they are in pain, that I see they are self-destructing. I can and will tell them that it will be difficult but it is possible.
I did just what I stated….I told someone that I recognized they are self- destructing and there is help for them. I told them I recognized they were losing control and it was becoming harder to manage and set limits (that is what happens when you are an alcoholic). I told them they could count on me if they needed help.
We all know the ending to this story…something bad will happen and everyone will cry and say they knew it would happen….shame on you and all of us for not being honest with people, for not giving your friend, brother, son and boyfriend the straight talk he needed. From this I expect straight talk from others if I am on a path of self-destruction.